Cultivating A Positive Attitude

Guest Blog by Susan Pattis

In the 19th century, a greedy and corrupt Governor of Kansas offered a large reward; the state would pay fifty dollars for every native Indian killed. Two gunfight veterans, Billy and Tom, took the opportunity for quick cash by trying to kill some Indians with rifles. After thirty days of roaming the wild, they hadn’t found a single Indian. A terrible sandstorm blew up on their way home, which took their water supplies, and they lost their horses in the dust. Amazingly, Billy and Tom survived the storm. After a few hours with only their guns in their hands, the two men found themselves surrounded by tens of thousands of Indians holding rifles and looking enraged from behind every rock, wading across every stream, and standing in every field on horseback. "We will be wealthy now, partner," Tom said excitedly to Billy. "No, we can’t kill them now; you see, the Indians did not hurt us when they had the chance," Billy told Tom. Billy stepped away and gave up his rifle, but Tom fired three times and killed two Indians. The Indians fired back and killed Tom but allowed Billy to leave.

Billy lost one of his eyes after falling onto a large sharp rock as he ran away. "Thanks to God, I still have one healthy eye to see the beautiful world, but Tom has gone forever," Billy told his family at the hospital. Billy and Tom took different approaches during the events with different results. Many unexpected incidents happen daily, depending on how we see the situation. You will be joyful if you treat life as candy regardless of what happens. If you treat your life as a bitter fruit, your entire life will be toxic with sadness and resentment. It is common to have a life of ups and downs. You will only know how to enjoy the ups if you know about the downs.

A client told me her story about a positive attitude. After a diagnostic test on her grandmother, the doctor informed the family that she had only six months to live because of Cancer; her parents completely broke down at the terrible news. The whole family decided to keep it secret from the grandmother to fill her last months with happiness and love. Her grandmother noticed something was wrong in the family because everyone suddenly treated her with extra care and attention, even those relatives who had ignored her for many years. One day, her grandmother asked her mother, "tell me the truth, is something wrong with my health? Don't hide from me anymore." After learning about the situation of the disease, her grandmother reacted with a calm and positive attitude. "It’s ok, and I have no fear about death. We all have to go someday; this is the destiny of all humans. I accept my death path with gratitude because I have had more love and care from you all for the past few days than in the past ten years." So, her grandmother was in pain, but she was strong, and she lived for thirteen months instead of the predicted six. Please don't fear death; it is the ultimate truth of life for all.

Are you currently holding a positive attitude in a difficult situation? Are you keeping hope alive when you just failed a job interview at sixty? Do you have the courage to start a new business after being laughed at as a failed entrepreneur? Will you fall in love again after knowing your partner cheated on you? Holding a positive attitude might not win you the lottery, but your attitude will ensure that your spirit stays at an all-time high and that you do your best even in the darkest times. You are the creator of yourself, and whatever happens in your life results from your creation. Please accept who you are and live life on your terms, not on the expectations of others. Never apologize for being yourself and taking the less traveled road instead of a bitter path of tears and pain. Laugh in the face of difficulties, leap without judgment, match the melody of your music, and dance with real life.

Another example is a personal story that happened to me long ago. I received a phone call from a college classmate. It was early in the morning. She asked me to lend her $2000 for emergency surgery following a car accident. She promised to return the money two days later after receiving funds from her parents. I went straight to the bank and transferred the funds to her account since I felt the urgency from my classmate’s voice. After I wired her the funds, my bank account balance had only $110 left; $2000 was big money for a college student. She didn’t return the money in the two days as promised. She didn’t call and didn’t text me.

During the following seven days, I called her several times and left a few messages, but she refused to take my call and never replied. I gave up calling her after that because I didn’t want my life messed up with anger and resentment because she dishonored my trust. A month later, I happened to meet her on campus. I smiled and said nothing as I walked on by. Two days later, I received a note from her: "I am so sorry for breaking my word, but I have no money to pay you back because my mother has lost her job." Indeed, she never paid the money back. She taught me an important lesson: never let an adverse event destroy my inner peace and compassionate heart.

Here is another classic story showing that everything happens for a good reason. Once there was a king in Nepal, the king was very dominant with no faith in GOD, but his medical doctor believed in GOD with his heart and soul. On a hunting trip to a remote forest, the king got a significant cut on his thumb, and the doctor had to cut off his thumb due to a severe infection. "How could a king live without a thumb? A king should be perfect?" the king screamed angrily at the doctor. The doctor replied to the king calmly, "don’t worry, my king, there must be a good reason for this; think positive, my lord." The king was so upset that he dismissed the doctor after the trip. The king went on another hunting trip to a different remote jungle two years later. This time he was caught by a local tribe wanting a human sacrifice.

The king was about to be burned alive when the tribe leader noticed that the king's right hand had a missing thumb. They released the king and chose the king's bodyguard to be the sacrifice. The king called the medical doctor back to the palace and said, "please accept my sincere apology; you saved my life from the tribe people; I will take your word seriously with honor from now on." "I am grateful, my lord, for having another chance to serve you, but you should thank GOD, not me, because I follow the voice from GOD inside my heart and soul. I am grateful you dismissed me that time; otherwise, I might have been the sacrifice in place of your bodyguard." Attitude creates miracles.

A classy lady woke up one morning and noticed in the mirror that she had only three hairs on her head. "I will braid my hair today," she said to herself. So, she had a great day. The next day she looked in the mirror after waking up and saw that she had only two hairs on her head. "I can divide my hair down the middle," she said. So, she did and had a wonderful day. The following day after waking up, she noticed in the mirror that she had only one hair. "Well, today, I am going to wear my hair in a ponytail," she said. She did exactly that and had a joyful day. The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror, and realized that she had no hair. "Finally, I don't have to fix my hair anymore," she said to herself, and she had a good life.

Attitude is the most valuable trait to live a happy and fruitful life. Most people spend too much time during the day thinking about bad things that they forget to notice the good and happy things in their lives. Many people wait for the perfect moment to enjoy life, which might never come. So, take every chance to enjoy a precious life when you still have the time and the energy.